THE STRUGGLES OF ADULTING

THE STRUGGLES OF ADULTING

Being an adult is hard.

As kids, we thought being an adult was this miraculous accomplishment. Most of us couldn’t wait to grow up, to be able to go buy our own stuff and eat as much cake as you want whenever you want without anyone ever telling you no.

Now, I’m not sure if it was some sick joke all adults took part in but I don’t recall ever being warned of the hell in which adults seem to live in. It’s not all puppies and rainbows. Yes, it’s all you can eat cake. But it’s also all you can gain while eating that cake. I wish someone was here to tell me no besides my conscience which I’ve gotten pretty good at ignoring.

Maybe describing being an adult as hell is a bit dramatic, or an understatement, I’ll let you decide. Whatever It is, it’s hard. And more and more each day I’m understanding why Brittany Spears had her meltdown and shaved her head in 2007.

What motivated me to start this post (rant) was the fact that I am now living on my own, finished college and I am completely lost. So I decided to write why it’s so important to take care of yourself even when it feels like you have 100+ things going on in your life.

When you’re in College or University, it’s 2+ years of your life that’s filled with stress, tears, laughter and more tears. Plus anger. Lots and lots of anger. Now, how can you be prepared for all of this? Well, you really can’t. It’s always going to be stressful. It’s how you handle the stress that matters. Sometimes it’s a trial and error. If time management doesn’t work for you, then try something else. If you try meditation and it doesn’t work, then move on to the next experiment. If you want to scream at the top of your lungs in the middle of the woods, go for it. Once you find something that helps you deal with stress, hold on to it and resort to it.

When in school, everyone procrastinates. Hell, procrastinating is my best skill. All three times I’ve been to university/college (indecisive much?) I’ve found myself scurring the last minute to finish assignments. I use to beat myself up, cursing myself and telling myself I should have started it sooner. Then I realized, this is what works for me. Everyone looks at procrastination as a bad thing, but is it? Okay yeah it kind of is, but some people have to do what works for them. Even if you do a little bit here and there and put the final touches in the day before, I feel like that’s okay.

I’ve come to realize procrastination isn’t just laziness though, sometimes it’s legitimately not having enough time or mental energy. Think about it, we’re students. We’re adult students. Some of us are in our twenties, moved out and trying to pay rent. Not to mention we’re living off of KD and Mr.Noodles, working full time all while studying full time. That’s some hard shit, and if you do all that while finishing your homework weeks in advance; you’re not human. Just sayin’.

But really, the amount of stress a student has to go through is tremendous. There’s no even balance between school, work and social life. One thing I realized while in school was that I couldn’t let school and work just be my life. It drove me insane and being someone who suffers from mental illness, it wasn’t healthy for me. I got into this repetition of school then work then school then work that I was not only mentally drained but physically drained. My muscles ached, I had headaches, I had dark circles under my eyes and I was more irritable than usual. I felt like a real-life grumpy zombie (can zombies be happy?). At one point I asked myself, “is this how I really want to live my life?” At times I found myself depressed where it came to the point of skipping school and literally dragging myself to work. My obsession with school and work turned into depression, and that’s a road I really didn’t want to go down.

Point is, take care of yourself. The stress of school and work can get on top of you, but to only have those two stresses in your life will drag you down. You NEED some relaxing you time. Add in some time with friends or a movie night with family. Put aside money each month so you can go out for dinner. Or even take a break and go grab a coffee and go for a walk to clear your head. Being physically and mentally exhausted, I’ve learned, is not good for anyones health, which is a clear fact. So if you can find it in your busy schedule to have some you time, it might be that extra step in your life that’ll help you clear your head and feel more relaxed.

Find that one thing that you love. It could be running, petting dogs or going for a long drive. The little things will help the bigger things going on in your life.

So now, being done school, I’m totally stressing. I went through this low point because I was so sad and I had no idea what to do with my life. So I started going for runs, I started writing again and I started putting some positive energy into creating a recycling program at work and in my own household. Finding these positive things in my life helped me look at the bad with a clear mind and tell myself that it’s going to be okay.

You do you. Eat that piece of cake. Read that last chapter. Drink that mojito. Do what makes you happy, don’t let the stress of becoming an adult and/or student take that fun away from you.

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11 thoughts on “THE STRUGGLES OF ADULTING

  1. Really great article Somer! Being an adult is very hard and it does seem like a sick joke that most kids want to be adults sooner rather than later. Having responsibilities can be so stressful and you’re totally right that you need to find activities that make you happy!

  2. This piece is so insightful and relatable. I’ve been watching my daughter learn these ropes – she really values and maximizes her time off by planning a fun activity and spending time with friends. This really seems to help her manage stress and keep sane. Thank you for sharing 💕

    1. Thank you for your comment! I’m glad your daughter is finding ways to manage stress, it’s definitely hard!

  3. Great post. Being an adult can really suck, so it’s about making life work for you. It’s nine years on since I graduated and I haven’t done what I wanted to do because I allowed others to hold me back. If I’ve learnt anything is that if you want something, go for it! It’s better to have tried and failed than to not try at all.

    Good luck with everything!

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